(if the text might appear in "Germish", please have in mind that it is not my mother tounge ;-))
Let me
start this topic with one of my own, personal experiences
that influenced my life and
cultural thinking in a very radical and deep way. It changed my life, way of thinking and added high energy to my belief and will to drive the new cultur forward. Maybe this will happen to you as well.
Well, so I
had to move. Seen from today, that was the best that ever happened to me.
Why? Well, after 12 years of working in Frankfurt, surrounded by powder-hoovers
in business suits
and with a burnout-like workload
by standard, I started in a
country and company, where work-life-balance
is not just a word, but a passion.
Up there almost everyone puts family first in his life and work second. You
could even identify German colleagues on a visit immediately only by watching
them walk and talk. Seeing “myself” from the outside because of that discovery was an incredible
experience and intense cleaning for my soul, biases and way of thinking, that motivated me to put even more
energy to the cultural topic than before. Different people work different but often have the same goals. Diversity can be King, you just need to see it and let it happen.
One of my colleagues that I had to work with every day and globally, was a guy that just turned 30, married, house and two wonderful girls, 5 and 7 years old. His name is Bent, a quite unusual name for me and of course I teased him every time when we were standing around with the words “Bent! …down!”. These days I was more that type "divorced, no kids, random relationships" but still having this family dreams. I can say that I was quite jealous because of his perfect family life. He invited me in the first week to his house, I met his wonderful wife and the kids and we had a fantastic evening, laughing a lot, planning our global trainings and reinforcing our business relationship. What a nice guy, open minded, empathic, emotional and full of energy to "rock the house" with me on our Culture project. That’s what we did. We travelled the world as a team from China to US, Canada, UK and so on, teaching Quality Culture with huge success. You could say life was good to me these days and my energy level was exceeding what I thought before was the maximum already. The first time in my life I did it for the job and not for the money. This is what freedom means.
One day Bent invited me for a beer and told me the sad news for me, that he will leave to another department where there is a very good career opportunity for him. Even when it was sad for me to lose such a reliable and good colleague, I understood his intention, because he wanted to offer something to his family and little daughters. What I didn’t know was, that his wife was about to look out for other “options” because he was in her eyes working and traveling too much. He was preparing himself to earn more and travel less so that he could afford the loan for the house after a divorce and to spend more time with his kids.
Nevertheless, the days and weeks went by and I continued doing my job, seeing him from time to time but something has changed. He was not walking “on clouds” anymore, was always in a rush and busy, no time to have a coffee chat with me in the canteen. Well, I thought it is quite normal when you take a job with a higher salary, you are facing more responsibility and workload. Adding the private stress with the divorce, kids and the house, I understood that there is nothing to complain for me, only to offer my help if needed and being there as a friend.
Then I heard that he got a new manager, a (typical) German guy that was send on delegation to solve the problems in his team because the numbers were not the best (calculated by an external Advisory company). I identified this guy immediately, guess how? …because of his way of walking and body language, eyes, fake smile and bold behaviour wherever he appeared. For me it was like a flashback being back in Frankfurt again. I felt really sorry for him because I know this career driven, egoistic mindset Bent will have to face now. Some idiots call them “tough guys”. For me they are just money driven corporate psychopaths.
Three weeks later all employees were called via the emergency speaker system in the offices to come immediately to the canteen for an announcement. A noticeably pale HR manager told us that my wonderful colleague committed suicide by jumping from the roof of the building, after his manager told him that he is fired. Can you imagine? I even heard the noise when he smashed on the concrete, but didn’t took notice. They also told us that we are not allowed to talk to the press or anyone in public about this incident. They even said if we do, it would have severe consequences. For me it meant, that they added just another level of shock on the one I had already. I had no idea what to think at that moment.
After this experience and after I came over my own shock, I changed my strategy and attitude against what I am doing. Instead of teaching only a Quality Culture, I added the topic of Leadership into my trainings, pointing out how important it is today to understand, that management should have NOTHING to do when it comes to people topics. Managing human beings is outdated and an ancient relict of the last millennium. I also felt bad because I was aware of all the signs and didn’t insist. I was almost raging because our company culture was totally unable to prevent this incident from happening, because I shouldn’t be the only one looking after my colleagues and I am definitely not the only one who can see.
Ask yourself and write it down: What is it what a Leader must have to be a Leader?
For all of those who call themselves a manager, be aware that your decisions actually can kill people and think twice or more when it comes to painful decisions you need to make. Other examples for what bad management can do to people can be seen by the decisions of the EU. Because of the bad decisions for farmers in the EU and the support of the milk overproduction that pressures the price to the bottom for the sake of giant global corporates, in only ONE year around 600 French farmers committed suicide. So, with Bent I didn’t whiteness only a single event, I experienced effects of bad management directly.
Without asking you managers reading this, I am sure that none of you would want to have such an experience in your family, neighbourhood or with your friends and colleagues.
For all the Leaders reading this, have you checked if your company culture matches your ideas of leadership?
Since this incident, Culture, Change and especially Leadership became not only my profession, it is my intrinsic passion and I am burning to make this world a better place.
Feel free to join!
Likes and comments are welcome, giving me an impression about what YOU think about this topic!
*in memory of Bent
